In the Ditch with BO

I confess, I enjoy Jon Stewart more when he’s creaming Democrats. And I admire the talent, too: unlike Gary Trudeau of Doonesbury fame, Stewart can lampoon without embedding crypto-compliments (see today’s “He can’t empathize because he’s always thinking” strip.)

Wait- I thought BO had retired the “drove the car into the ditch” metaphor after 6,000 times at bat.  I guess I was wrong.  But, since I’m on the subject, let’s talk about metaphors.  Let’s say the economy is the car and that the Republicans drove it into the ditch.  And Obama and the Democrats have been trying to get that car out of the muddy, sticky, dirty, swampy, ditch, and they’ve been grunting, pulling, tugging, shoving, pushing– to no avail, but it certainly explains the moniker “BO.”  When the Republicans get done with their Slurpees and ask for the keys back, and the car is still in the ditch- that vast, quicksand-y fire swamp of despond– why the hell wouldn’t you give the keys back and say, “Good luck with that.  I’m calling a cab?”

I’ll tell you why.  Because the car, where it is, has been viewed as a valuable just where it sits in the muck by the Democrats.  Obama hasn’t been trying to push it out, he’s set up a chop shop right there in the ditch and has been parceling out the good parts to his pals, while all the folks IN THE CAR who thought they were electing AAA to get them the hell out of the ditch are sitting in the car and voting- and a whole lot of them are not voting for either the guys who ran them into the ditch OR the goombas who are prying the hubcaps off.  Until election time, though, the passengers have been captive, with the goombas coming by periodically to extort money to “jumpstart” the economy car.  That’ll be $Trillion, please.

Speaking of running things into a ditch, I think we should pitch in and send BO one of these.  Just tell him it’s a Telepromter on wheels, point it at the M Street bridge and let ‘er rip.

One thought on “In the Ditch with BO

  1. The linked story on the Segway guy has another lovely metaphor that is applicable. The gentleman drove his machine off a cliff, “but no cause of death was established.”

    It wouldn’t do to jump to conclusions–perhaps he had a heart attack. Unless he was truly dead within a few seconds, though, one could intelligently conclude that the impact at the bottom of the cliff was the decisive factor.

    Our economy also figuratively went over a cliff, “but no cause of death was established,” at least in terms of some actual human being stating “I f(ouled) up!” Ben Bernanke, rehired. Barney Frank, probably reelected. The whole diffuse federal government apparatus that made irrationality seem rational, still in place.

    The election next month is about this issue for many Americans, even if they don’t articulate it in those terms. They think they want “change.” But a different colored shirt on the driver doesn’t prevent going into the ditch. A driver who knows the limits of his machine is a good start.

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